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esm398:

jakebumlick:

pika-brew:

pika-brew:

My roommate and I are really sick and we look like shit, but we were hungry so we ordered pizza.
But we didn’t want anyone to see us, so we asked them over the phone if we can leave the money on the door and they can just drop off the pizza.

The guy said sure.

So we decided to leave a nice little note
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and we hung it above the door bell. I hope they like it!

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oMGGGG

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pizza cares

Pizza understands

egobus:

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me as a teacher tbh

arrogantdad:

my mom told me that in high school she use to get boyfriends at the beginning of February so they had enough time to get her a valentines day gift and then break up with them the day after and just keep the gift and one day she told her parents about it and they made her keep her boyfriend at least until the end of February and so she did and that boy is now my dad

maybe if i was attractive this whole love life thing would be easier

returquoise:

When you try to think of a word and can only remember it in another language.

onlyproof:

me too hayley, me too

TMI characters as parents

hungarianducks:

Jace

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Clary

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Simon

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Isabelle

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Magnus

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Alec

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Jordan

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Maia

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Jocelyn

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Luke

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Sebastian

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Valentine

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percypeetapotterfan:

fearwakes-me-up:

ellierose101:

striderkid:

dokidoki-artichokee:

hamburgurl:

1 universe, 9 planets, 7 seas, 7 continents, 809 islands, 204 countries, and I had the unfortunate luck of meeting u

THERE ARE 8 PLANETS, YOU UNCULTURED SWINE.

VIVA LA PLUTO FUCK YOU

I’m pretty sure “Viva la Pluto fuck you” is the best sentence I’ve heard all week. 

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DID THE PERCY JACKSON FANDOM JUST HIGHJACK A POST???